My worst (& best) email subject lines
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Want to see some subject lines that missed the mark? Find out why they didn’t work, along with possible suggestions to make them better. Plus see some that did work (and steal them if you want).
My worst & email subject lines – learn from my mistakes
Subject lines are fabulously exciting! It seems that so much rests on such a few words. And while there is some science behind writing effective subject lines, there are so many variables that sometimes it’s difficult to say why something works and another doesn’t.
Even when you have a huge testing ground, like a 200k list of subscribers, trends emerge, but sometimes anomalies occur that are difficult to attribute meaning. I go into this in more detail in my “What’s Wororking in Ecommerce Emails?” (which you get access to, when you subscribe for emails tips here). as I analyse the testing we’ve done with one of my clients emails over a period of 9-12 months.
Before I get started and share my own personal worst subject lines, I have to say that my list size is pretty small but you can still get a sense of what works for my subscribers by the open rate percentage (that’s just the metric that’s used to figure out how many people opened the email out of all the emails sent).
So here are my worst (and also a few of my best) subject lines plus a little context about what was behind the copy, and why I think it bombed.
I’ve had a few email accounts over the years (Mailchimp, Mailerlite, ConvertKit) and only some of these I still have records for but some go back quite a few years.
My Subject Lines – from the early days (2017)
Creativity for sale - or did I say love/hate? (7.69%)
This was a play on the book title “Magic Kingdom for Sale/ Sold”. I was definitely trying to be clever here, and while that may work if all my subscribers were Terry Brooks fans, it missed the mark here. This email was about my struggle with creativity, but the subject line didn’t really say that. It’s pretty confusing and to be honest it doesn’t MEAN anything.
What would I try instead now?
Perhaps “My struggle with creativity” or “do you struggle with coming up with ideas too?” or something along the lines of a question because often your subscriber needs to know… what’s in it for them. If it’s all about ME then unless you’re a megastar, people aren’t that interested.
A belated update… (9.44%)
Again this one is about ME, it gives no indication of what’s in it for the reader. Also because I have quite a small list no one really cares about my update. No wonder this one tanked. The email was about a personal challenge I had set for myself and I’d promised to send out an update on the progress. However, it was a bit late. Lesson is, don’t draw attention to the fact you’ve ghosted your subscribers.
What would I try now instead?
“How I wrote 20 blogs in 20 days”. This is a more direct subject line and adds a little curiosity about the secret behind doing that.
the nth degree of procrastination! (9.19%)
As you can probably tell, this was all about how I procrastinate when it comes to writing. However, even though that makes sense, it’s still not clear. Back in 2017 I was still trying to be über creative with my subject lines but over time I’ve realised the more direct I am, the better. That doesn’t mean cryptic subject lines don’t work, but if that’s all you do then you’ll lose your subscribers' attention as it gets boring.
What would I try now instead?
“Procrastination is a silent killer” or “The killer that lives with me”. This second one is a bit more curiosity provoking and I’ve found curiosity often doesn’t work quite as well, but this one leaves a question unanswered and it’s human nature to want to answer the question posed. It’s also a little click-baity which is dangerous ground, but as long as you “pay-off” the subject line, then you’re good. You need to make your email content relevant to the subject line and close any loops you’ve opened by answering any questions you may have subconsciously raised.
Subject Lines – post 2017
At some point during this time I switched email service providers and I cleaned my list (I’ll link an article on how to do that once I write it) which reduced my subscribers by half. It was sad to see those subscribers go, but they weren’t interested in opening my emails so it was pointless paying for a person on my list that’s not interested in hearing from me.
Time sensitive: don't wan't you to miss this… (11.7%)
Even with a non-intentional typo, this didn’t get a very good open rate. Sometimes typos or unusual ways of writing words can get a spike in curiosity, but this one totally missed the mark. Also, it looks quite salesy. And if people think you’re gonna sell to them, they get jittery and avoid it. This can be quite different if you’re selling products and you already have a list of customers, then they’ll most likely want to know how they can get their hands on a good deal.
What would I try now instead?
“When the clock is ticking…” or “2 days left to win $50 (easy entry)” I would try either of these two subject lines but to be honest I’m not sure they’d work on my list mainly because it’s small but also this type of offer is not something that the people on my list are probably interested in (even though it’s an easy win. Lesson is... know your audience.
let you in on a secret (12.0%)
This was an email to let people know that I’d pulled the plug on my email course. THe reason was because I was trying to do too much and couldn’t give it justice. However, the subject lines is to murky and while it does provoke curiosity, know one was really interested in a secret from me.
What would I try now instead?
Something more direct like “the REAL reason I pulled the plug on my launch” or something a bit more catastrophic “why my course launch failed”. People love to rubberneck and see a car crash so any failure is always people like to dissect. IT’s not a bad thing, just human nature… which is why as marketers we need to understand human nature to harness it so we can sell better.
do you really need a welcome sequence? (7.6%)
To be honest this may have been an anomaly as I don’t know why this wouldn’t work as a subject line. Especially since I’m an email copywriter. However I have transitioned or pivoted several times in my business so it may be that this came a little out of left field for some who knew me in my past life as a business manager or coach. Looking back at the date, it was early on when I was focusing more on email copywriting so that could be the reason for the fail.
What would I try now instead?
I’m not sure I would try something different. In fact as I’m writing this I may test this one again and see what the results are. Maybe I would split test it with “how to write a kickass welcome sequence” which is the training that my email pushed to.
The difference of a name (9.1%)
This was when I changed my surname back to my maiden name after separating from my husband. I wanted to let people know so they would still recognize me. Again, this is another instance where people really don’t care about you, only what’s in it for them.
What would I try instead now?
“The reason I changed my last name” or to bring it more into focus on them “would YOU change your last name?”.
What subject lines did work?
So there you see some of the failures when it comes to my email subject lines. Now let’s look at some of the better ones.
It's difficult to know what to say… (32%)
This one was right at the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic outbreak and I wrote about twenty different subject lines, but kept deleting them as they felt either insincere or spell blasé – which was the opposite of what the email was about, so I had to go with my gut and say what I actually though at the time. Not knowing what to say in my subject line was as real as not knowing what to say about the situation too.
The best (non-biz) podcast your ears need to hear (34.4%)
After taking up a regular gym routine, I’ve found myself listening to more and more podcasts. Going four times a week for an hour each time, I exhausted many of my favorite shows so I started scouring Stitcher (I’m a Google girl) for something new and exciting. I stumbled on one podcast called Hollywood Unscripted that dives into the behind-the-scenes of various films and projects in Hollywood. It’s fascinating and I really love listening to something that is a throwback to my acting days.
So in terms of subject lines, this one was a great one that did really well. I think it’s because it’s a recommendation plus also lots of curiosity around the hype. But it didn’t feel hypey because it was a genuine gush of love for this podcast and I think I conveyed this in the email too. You can read the email here.
That personality thing (37.5%)
Again another great open rate (and in my opinion a great email too which I’ve actually repurposed as part of my ongoing automated email series – which you’ll get if you subscribe to my list via the form in the footer of this blog). To be honest I could analyse this til the cows come home but other than curiosity, I’ve no idea why this did so well!
The best Venn diagram EVER… (30.8%)
Now this one’s a cracker. The email has about ten words in it and an image. It was one of those things that I just had to share with my subscribers because it made me laugh. Venn diagrams are all over the place online but this one really topped the bill. Again, this is another that I’ve repurposed into my automation sequence because it did pretty well.
I like this subject line because it’s straight to the point, a recommendation just like the one above and as a reader I feel you just have to know what it is I’m talking about.
What I’ve learned from client subject lines
Working with clients in ecommerce I’ve had the opportunity to test, test, test and what I’ve learned from all that testing is this… direct subject lines beat curiosity. We look at the data, and it doesn’t lie when it comes to tracking open rates, click-thru rates and revenue.
I personally like a good curiosity line like the two subject lines above, but they’re still direct. They don’t leave you confused, you know what you’re getting when you open the email. And that’s what “direct” means. You still have the curiosity factor in terms of wanting to know what the best Venn Diagram is, or the best podcast is, but there’s no murkiness about what you’re going to learn.
What have I learned from my failures?
The point of showcasing some of my duds is to show you that even as an email copywriter I have my failures too. But you have to learn from each and every one of them.
Sometimes you can figure out why something works and other times you have no clue! That’s just the nature of copywriting!
One thing to take away is to remember that the only job of the subject line is to get them to open the email. That’s it. But beware of click-bait! You don’t want to get the open for the open's sake, it needs to lead somewhere and have a “pay-off”.